A loyal pledge made in solemnity, come hell or high water
15 June 2015
PAUL WAUGLA WII
An entry in the Crocodile Prize
Cleland Family Award for Heritage Writing
MARRIAGE is essentially a union between two people who undertake to remain loyal to each other come hell or high water.
In Papua New Guinea, it is not only a union between two people but also the extended families of the bride and groom are brought into the equation.
The relationship that is forged between the two families remains through many generations. As long as the marriage is not dissolved along the way, the bond will continue in perpetuity.
In almost every society in the world, young people meet, share intimate affection for one another and – when all goes well- get married.
That moment when young people begin to court each other is a defining moment in a person’s life. It is likely to culminate in marriage although, in the end, love may not always be a prerequisite for a successful marriage.
In Papua New Guinea, the courtship custom which precedes marriage is a coming-of-age ritual that a typical youngster encounters at some stage.
Unlike in the past, most Papua New Guineans nowadays prefer to have a wedding in church. Couples prefer to walk down the aisle together because they know that such a marriage undertaking conforms to religious and legal requirements.
Marriage vows are exchanged between bride and groom. This pledge is usually made in the presence of a minister or priest who is vested with the authority to oversee the execution of this undertaking.
In PNG, a modern wedding ceremony is completed within the safe confines of moral and legal boundaries. I believe that customarily-approved marriages are also undertaken within the norms and moral values of the communities concerned.
Many readers must have witnessed a wedding in your village or neighbourhood in the not-too-distant past. Perhaps you were involved in one yourself not long ago and the memory of that blissful day as you walked down the aisle with your beloved remains vivid in your mind.
The two of you were adorned in your finest wedding apparel and had eyes only for each other while the presence of the audience in the room blurred into insignificance. Love was truly in the air.
A marriage ceremony, whether it is performed in a posh Los Angeles neighbourhood or on the Sepik plains of PNG, has a big thing in common.
The young couple must get to know and understand each other as best they can in order to chart a journey together.
This new life that begins immediately they forge a union is a life not without its share of triumphs and tribulations.
But the intent is to be loyal to each other - come hell or high water
Comments