A period away from my desk but it’s business nearly as usual
My Papua New Guinea family, which is so dear to me

On being a girl & being a boy


I would like to share this piece of wisdom with younger people who are starting out in a blossoming relationship, something I went through when I was younger.

I am now a mother who has experienced life with my boyfriend who is now my husband.

I have learned that in intimate relationships, however deep or shallow, it is patience for one another and respect for yourself and others that are virtues weighed in gold.

Being a girl

Being a girl, I’ve been told that my kisses are worth more than a party or a movie,

My body is the temple of God – it is not a plaything.

It’s true the first “no” may be difficult, but I’ve been told after that – it’s easy.

They say virginity is still a virtue; lust is still a capital sin. The Bible sums it up, thou shall not commit adultery or fornicate and thou shall not covet.

I’ve been told the way I dress, act and speak may be a temptation to the opposite sex. I must admit to observe modesty for his and my protection.

My parents have done so much for me, I wish always to be a credit to them.

My boyfriend will be a husband and father someday. He must be a hero in the eyes of his wife and children. I will do nothing to prevent that on my dates with him.

I want to be a wife and mother. I will reserve my purity and affection for my husband and children.

If through my weakness I should get pregnant, I will not take “the easy way out” by aborting my unborn child.

Being a boy

The parents of my girlfriend place their trust in me. I will not violate it.

I will respect womanhood because my mother is a woman. I will ask my girlfriend to do nothing that I would be ashamed of if my mother found out.

My girlfriend has given me the honour and pleasure of her company. It is wrong for me to expect more in payment for this date.

My girlfriend will be a wife and mother someday. She must be an example to her children and the pride of her husband. I will help her to be as pure and decent as I want my own wife to be.

Manhood means strength as well as body. Lack of self-control is a sign of weakness. I want my girlfriend to know I am manly.

God is everywhere, sees everything, and knows everything. Darkness may hide me from people but it cannot hide me from God.

If through my lack of self-control, I should get a girl pregnant, I will not put pressure on her to kill our unborn child.


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`Robin Lillicrapp

Wise words, Bessielah.

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