There was a time when
mankind, manpower and sportsmanship
were just words, and you can have a
gentleman’s agreement with any woman.
Black and white were beautiful colours,
and blue was the colour of the sky on a sunny day.
Gay means happy and a hoe
was a gardening tool you fag with.
An ass was a donkey, a pussy was a cat
and only Maggie, our pet beagle, was a bitch.
69 was the number between 68 and 70,
or the sum of 5 and 64—oops!
My son, 8, came home from school one day
with a list of big words
and killed our Egyptian Mau.
It’s disgusting, Dad. You gotta be real careful!
From now on, say ‘sixty-NONE’.
I grew up too slow.